back

its been quite a long  time since i last posted on my blog. I want to fill this blog with memories so that i can always look at the happy times whenever im down to remind myself how much i change and the good times i had. Im having my holidays now , with nothing much to do the first week except for today . Been playing dota watching anime the standard stuff at home . Alot of thoughts ran into my mind , negative thoughts . Firstly  school problems whereby lots of people just hate me and toss me aside. Although im finally away from there i feel very unwanted and insecured whenever i stepped into school . No one realize how much i been through , before i stepped into poly i had this goal to have a close friend where i can count on and etc, however till now i havent found someone in school that i can trust . I didnt wanted to be hated or left out like in secondary school , but ended up its the same like last year though its not as bad. I wondered to myself have i changed ? or am i still the same person ? . My wish is to be accepted by people in this world . I know i made mistakes in the past , sometimes i say things without knowing , sometimes im arrogant .. i wish people approach me and not just ignore me and walk away whenever i did sometimes or say something wrong . Today was a great day , i went to work at a event as a zombie with clement and jonathan , having fun and laughter while working , i didn even realize i was working .We had to pull their life force tag from runners and be scary as possible . It was really fun . I loved today for the past few weeks for emoing .